Queen Teen is very very very very very very sick. She's had a high fever and a bad cough for three days. Instead of going to school, I'm staying home with her because I found it physically impossible for me to leave. Really. I tried to pack up my gear this morning but I realized I was just standing in my room clutching my toothbrush while staring at my very dirty fishbowl thinking, "There's no way in hell I'm leaving." I returned my toothbrush to the bathroom and emailed my professors. So what if I get a hit on my grade; my girl needs me.
When I told Rick I was staying home he argued with me. "I can take care of her. Don't mess up your grades!"
"I know you can take care of her, but I simply can't leave."
"School is important. This is your career you're talking about. She's alright. I know what to do and I won't let anything happen to her. You need to go to class."
I just shrugged. "I can't. It is impossible for me to go. It's a mommy thing."
I didn't know how else to explain it and I know he doesn't understand. It's not that Rick is incapable of taking care of her. He's a great dad and knows perfectly well how to manage her fever and blow her nose. This feeling has nothing to do with his abilities as a care-giver. If Queen Teen just had a cold and was grumpy, I'd toss Rick the tissue box and say, "Have fun." Queen Teen has the flu. Last night her temp reached over 104 F. If I went to school tonight all I'd do the entire time is wonder how high her fever is while anxiously checking my messages every two minutes, fearing the worst. And if he did call saying Queen Teen needed me, I'd be over two hours away.
No. Impossible. Every cell in my body demands that I stay. My child has a gravitational pull on my psyche right now that nothing can escape. Not even sleep.
Does wiping green snot count as wearing green for St. Patrick's Day?